Routing experiments
BGP, IPv4/IPv6, route policy, and all the fun things that make network engineers stare blankly at terminal windows.
EXPERIMENTAL PACKET CONGESTION DEPARTMENT · EST. 2026
THE PIPE
IS CLOGGED.
Welcome to Clogged Pipe Network by Dekkapok Engineering. Where congestion is a feature, packet loss is premium, and BGP stands for Barely Getting Packets.
◇ 100% community-powered nonsense · 0% guaranteed delivery
↳ NETWORK_TOPOLOGY.SVG● CONCEPTUAL VIEW
CONGESTION IS OUR PASSIONPACKET LOSS GUARANTEED™YOUR PACKETS. OUR PROBLEM.99.999% DOWNTIME SLACONGESTION IS OUR PASSIONPACKET LOSS GUARANTEED™YOUR PACKETS. OUR PROBLEM.99.999% DOWNTIME SLA
01 / WHO ARE WE?
Professionally unserious.
Technically curious.
An independent internet plumbing experiment by Dekkapok Engineering. We route packets, question our life choices, and occasionally pretend the traceroute is fine.
Peering & connectivity
Building real-world networking experience through transit, interconnection, and occasionally questionable configurations.
Pipe maintenance
Self-hosted infrastructure, automation, monitoring, and experiments that absolutely could have been done the easy way.
02 / SERVICE LEVEL DISAGREEMENTS
Bad networking.
Excellent branding.
All the classic networking promises. Reinterpreted by the Dekkapok Engineering Department of Questionable Connectivity.
01 / CORE VALUE
Clogged Pipe™
Congestion is a feature, not a bug. We don't have bottlenecks. We have intentional packet gathering areas.
02 / PREMIUM DELIVERY
Packet Loss Guaranteed™
Premium networking experience. Your packets are important to us. That's why we keep a few as souvenirs.
03 / DELIVERY POLICY
Best-Effort Networking
Very, very best effort. We absolutely intended to forward your packets. What happened next is between the routers.
04 / TOTALLY NOT AN SLA
99.999% Downtime SLA
Five nines, inverted. Industry-leading commitment to making the uptime graph look like modern abstract art.
05 / CONTROL PLANE
BGP: Barely Getting Packets
Border Gateway Protocol? Never heard of it. We prefer Barely Getting Packets. Our favorite route is the scenic route.
06 / CUSTOMER SATISFACTION
It Works As Named™
If the pipe is clogged, the name is accurate. That's not an outage. That's unmatched product consistency.
UPSTREAM PROVIDER · NOC TICKET #404“Why is the network congested?”
CLOGGED PIPE NETWORK · OFFICIAL RESPONSE“It's working as named.” 💀
FICTIONAL SERVICE STATUS
Guaranteed disappointment.
Our network is doing exactly what the marketing department promised. These are parody values, not measured network telemetry.
ADVERTISED DOWNTIME99.999%
PACKET DELIVERY¯\_(ツ)_/¯
BGP MOODFLAPPING
ROOT CAUSEDNS*
*It's always DNS. Except when it's MTU. Then it's definitely MTU.
View Full Abstract Uptime & Global Routing ↗INTERACTIVE / PARODY DIAGNOSTICS
Run the blame engine.
Generate an incident report from our highly unaccredited network engineering department.
$ pipe-doctor --diagnose STATUS: CONGESTED BY DESIGN HINT: Try blaming DNS.
SIMULATION ONLY · NO TRAFFIC SENT · NOT A REAL SLA
03 / THE TERMINAL
Packets have feelings too.
A fictional console demo, not a live looking-glass service. Real diagnostics can be plugged in later.
guest@clogged-pipe: ~
guest@clogged-pipe:~$ whois AS218321
Autonomous Sys: AS218321
AS Name : CLOGGEDPIPE
Network Name : Clogged Pipe Network
Network Type : Experimental / Packet Plumbing
Organization : Dekkapok Engineering
IPv4 Prefix : 169.40.33.0/24
IPv6 Prefixes : 2a0e:97c0:260::/44, 2a13:9500:1f6::/48
Routing Policy: Open (RPKI Strict)
Mission : Learning, breaking, fixing, repeating.
guest@clogged-pipe:~$ ping internet
# Demonstration output. No packets were actually sent.
64 bytes from internet: ttl=maybe time=eventually
64 bytes from internet: ttl=probably time=eventually
Warning: packets may take the scenic route.
guest@clogged-pipe:~$
04 / CONNECT WITH US
Let's exchange some routes.
Serious about BGP. Questionable about slogans. Check out our Open Peering Policy ↗ for BGP communities, RPKI requirements, and interconnection details.
NETWORK PROFILE
Network information
Network nameClogged Pipe Network
OperatorDekkapok Engineering
ASNAS218321 ↗
AS NameCLOGGEDPIPE
Network typeExperimental / Packet Plumbing
IPv4 prefix169.40.33.0/24
IPv6 prefixes2a0e:97c0:260::/44
2a13:9500:1f6::/48
2a13:9500:1f6::/48
Peering policyOpen (View Policy ↗)
SAY HELLO
Contact the NOC*
Have a peering question, found a routing anomaly, or just want to discuss why your packets went on vacation? We'd love to hear from you.
* NOC stands for Network Operations Comedy.
Mailbox is monitored by human network enthusiasts.
THE OFFICIAL UNOFFICIAL PROMISE
Your packets are in good hands.
Probably.
Clogged Pipe Network by Dekkapok Engineering — proudly congesting the internet since 2026. (Figuratively.)